I came up with a term to describe numerous males flirting with numerous females – Flirting orgies. I like it. Mass flirting orgies. And it’s just as gross as witnessing an orgy, erm, I bet.
Our Grad Nite is being held at some ulu hotel called the Furama City hotel, or should I say Futurama Hotel. Ama saw it – it’s located right smack in Chinatown and in front of the hotel are cheena shops which sell bak qua. We’ll be hangin’ out with dead pork, y’all.
Ghost Rider
You know that you’ve just wasted $8 on a ridiculous movie when one of the bad guy’s dramatic quotes are, “Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I have sinned… A LOT!” then grins his evil smile and attacks a priest. Especially when it’s meant to be serious.
Sigh, Ghost Rider. Sigh, sigh, sigh. The trailers deceive you with awesome special effects. Especially the scene where the scene froze into a Matrix moment and the ghost rider swung his chain, hooked it onto some invisible thing on the vertical side of the building and pulled himself and the motorcycle down the wall. Awesome! Unfortunately only cool scenes were involved and proper dialogue was absent.
Seriously lah. Just look at the quotes which were incredulous enough to be stuck in my memory:
“YOU…… GUILTY.”
“YOU…… INNOCENT.”
That sort of Hulk-like language, as if his mental capacity and speaking ability decreased when he transforms into Ghost Rider.
Ghost Rider = Brauns, No brains.
“Hey, dirt bag.”
As I said, mental capacity decreased.. Come up with better insults man! Only 5 year olds call bullies “dirt bag”. You are THE Ghost Rider, despite the PG rating..
Devil’s Son: “Forgive me Father, for I have sinned…”
*whirls around to face camera and grins menacingly*
“I have sinned.. A LOT!” *cackles and kills priest*
What the fuck.
Robber: Please! Have mercy!
Ghost Rider: Sorry. All out of mercy! *kills robber with fiery eyes*
Oozes so much cheesiness that it builds up a calcium stone in my bladder.
“Nice jacket… Reeaall nice.”
It was meant to be an audience-enticing, clever retort when one of the gangsters attempted to beat Ghost Rider up after guffawing at him, “Nice jacket man,” and tried to steal his jacket. After Ghost Rider killed him, he grinned evilly and droned out that quote. Needless to say, my face was in “What the hell” mode.
“You’re pissing me off!”
Great way to express your feelings of annoyance, Ghost Ridah.
“I will use this curse… Against you.” *points menacingly*
ZOMG, Ghost Rider defies the Devil! Ghost Rider PWNZz dah Devil!
And many, many, many more. I suppose the movie was unbalanced – they used the special effects to make up for the lack of quality in the script.
But you can’t get past me man. Despite the really awesome visual effects, the script was too ridiculous to ignore.
Next issue: The actors. It was irking to see Nicholas Cage make out with Eva Mendes, oh I don’t know.. I think.. Because he looks like he’s twice her age even though they’re meant to be of the same age?! Lizard and I were squirming in our seats when we watched that scene. The chills still remain.
During the first part of the movie, a young Johnny Blaze (Ghost Rider) is seen making a deal with the Devil. That actor resembled bloody Tom-Look-At-ME!-Cruise, not Nicholas-Hunk-Cage. Also, Nicholas Cage seemed so awkward as Ghost Rider. Perhaps after transforming into Ghost Rider, he’s gotta put on a tough, Hulk-ish persona, so he walked like a gorilla and flexed his muscles like a jock. Words cannot express how awkward it was too see Nicholas Cage’s body moving like Hulk with a flaming skull simply plastered over his face.
Moving onto Eva Mendes. Nothing to say, except that for some unexplainable reason, I don’t like girls with moles consuming their faces and that she owned not a single blouse which she can button all the way to the top. Seriously, her boobs overflowed out of the blouse in a porn kind of way, which was probably her only contribution for the male viewers to the movie. If you’re interested in boobies, check out Ghost Rider.
Also, clearly the entire movie cast didn’t pay attention during science practicals. When the Ghost Rider’s orange flaming skull “cooled” upon seeing his loved one Eg. Roxanne (Eva), the orange flames turned blue. Holy shit!
On the other hand, there were some bright points. This is one of the few action movies which don’t involve cars/buildings/people blowing up (Cars blowing up are stupid. After taking a few gunshots to the TYRES, the enemy’s car usually instantly blows up into fiery flames, while even after taking several shots to the car body, windows and tyres, the protagonist’s car always gets away unscathed) and the scene where the motorcycle transformed into a fiery motorcycle from hell was awesome.
The antagonists looked terrific. Okay, maybe the Devil’s son looks a little too Jake-Gyllenhaal-ish, but his comrades make up for it. The demon which represented water was my favourite. When he made his first appearance in the movie, he seeped up from a puddle of goo and wiped OFF his eye, which promptly grew back again. Except the way he died.. Ghost Rider simply scared him to death and lit him up with fire underwater
It would probably also help Nicholas Cage if he didn’t look as if he splashed some tabasco sauce into his mouth while transforming into Ghost Rider.
It would probably also help if he wasn’t laughing during the painful process.
16 16 16
Yay yay happy birthday to me.
My sister transferred hosts, so a couple of my posts were deleted accidentally. Oh well.
Grooving to Malaysia tomorrow, will update when I get back.
I’m now legal to have sex and watch NC16 movies *smile*